I can't take it any longer. The cold sweats during sleepless nights tarnish my sanity. The tossing and turning on dampened cotton sheets is affecting the wife's rest. During a brief, and shallow sleep, my left eye lid never shuts. I've went through at least a case of visine keeping it lubed. Recently I turned to scotch tape to keep the lid closed.
It all started exactly one month ago, just before sunrise...
I awoke being shaken about the shoulders.
"Honey! Wake up!"
"Wha-what is it!"
"Your eye. It was wide open as you slept.
"Yes. Oh, it was eerie. And you kept mumbling W-B-Q and issue. Is there something wrong with the grill?
"Not that I know of. Wait a minute--."
"What is it?"
"Oh--um. Its nothing. I'll check it out today. Now, its four-thirty. Can we get some sleep?"
Unbeknownst to my lady partner, I knew exactly what those letters and word meant. And so the condition continues to this day...
The only cure I can think of is a back stage visitor pass to view the next great issue.