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  #6241  
Old 09-18-2018, 10:14 AM
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And Grace emerged from the fishmonger's bearing a fresh halibut wrapped in brown paper. "Hang on Flea", she said, releasing the fish with all the hurried rips and rustles of Christmas morning before testing its swing like a tennis racquet - and then using it to slap Flea's face resoundingly with that rapid left to right wrist movement of a billboard painter. A wicked grin now - offering no apology for metering out her violent slapstick reprimand. "Half your age", she said, hand on hip, "you've no business pinning the wings of youth in your trophy case", she told him with theatrical harshness, "false eyelashes don't sit well with false teeth on the nightstand". And Grace thought of David Bowie in 'The Hunger' - that sickening scene where he pulls the tiny dagger on a chain from his shirt-front and cuts the throat of the fresh-faced child playing her violin - sacrificing her youth just to delay a few years of his own accelerated vampire ageing. "No, don't think of it as ignoring each other then", Grace said, "but more testament to your mercy that you spared her" - the two of them stopping now to admire a Robin - shining, currant eyes fixed on them in fascination - almost tame in its tandem hops along the fence beside them - before taking flight to join its own kind in the treetops.

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  #6242  
Old 09-19-2018, 03:37 AM
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The morning found Grace stupefied. Nature, in all her magnificent defiance, was throwing an artist's tantrum outside of her window...furiously erasing her green foliage with a turpentine-soaked rag until her canvas bled...and streaked...and mingled to an earthy brown smear. Leaves torn from the trees with all the rage of a lover packing a suitcase to leave - her russet-red fury whipped into leaf cyclones that spun and danced out her agitation. Hot, angry tears splattering the landscape now as her boots stomped their way across the sky - flashes of white rage pulsing along the raised vein at her temple - barging her way through the trees so they swung like saloon doors in her wake. And Grace could hear the poet's Welsh lilt in her head..."no time to turn at Beauty's glance, and watch her feet, how they can dance..." and her mind projected the scene from 'American Beauty'..the young man captivated as the plastic bag pirouetted its poignant solo against the chorus of Autumn leaves...Grace losing time as the sound of the wind in the trees rushed in and out like waves crashing on the shoreline..her mind switched off as she laid her head on her arm and gave in to a fundamental sentience that made her dissolve and find peace. "I see beauty too," she whispered.
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  #6243  
Old 09-19-2018, 09:20 AM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
And Grace emerged from the fishmonger's bearing a fresh halibut wrapped in brown paper. "Hang on Flea", she said, releasing the fish with all the hurried rips and rustles of Christmas morning before testing its swing like a tennis racquet - and then using it to slap Flea's face resoundingly with that rapid left to right wrist movement of a billboard painter. A wicked grin now - offering no apology for metering out her violent slapstick reprimand. "Half your age", she said, hand on hip, "you've no business pinning the wings of youth in your trophy case", she told him with theatrical harshness, "false eyelashes don't sit well with false teeth on the nightstand". And Grace thought of David Bowie in 'The Hunger' - that sickening scene where he pulls the tiny dagger on a chain from his shirt-front and cuts the throat of the fresh-faced child playing her violin - sacrificing her youth just to delay a few years of his own accelerated vampire ageing. "No, don't think of it as ignoring each other then", Grace said, "but more testament to your mercy that you spared her" - the two of them stopping now to admire a Robin - shining, currant eyes fixed on them in fascination - almost tame in its tandem hops along the fence beside them - before taking flight to join its own kind in the treetops.
Damn, Grace - you don't have to be so harsh - but Jesus, talk about right on the mark.
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  #6244  
Old 09-19-2018, 10:13 AM
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Originally Posted by Prodigalson View Post
Damn, Grace - you don't have to be so harsh - but Jesus, talk about right on the mark.
Yeah...deliberate shock tactics to re-frame this thing realistically and help 'flick the switch off'...but I may of inadvertently removed the batteries and stomped on it a few times as well...the intention wasn't mean...
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  #6245  
Old 09-19-2018, 05:07 PM
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Originally Posted by Grace Gabriel View Post
Yeah...deliberate shock tactics to re-frame this thing realistically and help 'flick the switch off'...but I may of inadvertently removed the batteries and stomped on it a few times as well...the intention wasn't mean...


We can’t get good halibut (or any fish, really) here where I live. It’s just not possible. Well, we did order salmon from Alaska and had it Fed-exed overnight last year for Christmas. It was awesome, but for $275 dollars it wasn’t really worth it in the end.
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  #6246  
Old 09-21-2018, 09:25 PM
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to the goblin! the one who stayed loyal to the beat. and this sad-some chat byte only had the stems for three or four more loads. but oh, in her arms snuggled close yet prickly, a teensy little foozy. a loyal sniffling, sleeping angel. a dear snivelus...
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  #6247  
Old 09-21-2018, 09:27 PM
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Old 09-22-2018, 06:42 AM
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repost from elsewhere, being asked if he'd like to change venue due to the jumpy connection

"...well no, I'm happy here with you, for I can load pictures under the posts at the same time, and besides that then well you're about the only one who'll put up with me today..." smiled the goblin having had the girls at work close ranks against him, adding "...perhaps that will teach me to try to break out of someone's friendzone, simply the more one talks to someone one adores inside the more one falls in love with that person still, so let me break out and put up with everyone's hate, ah but she's so attractive still...", oh, and other than that the goblin's wife has also asked him not to inquire how she was each time, something understandable if one wants to forget one's illness while feeling somewhat better of late, then adding "...also she finds both my general smell and my breath intolerable due to her increased sensitivity, so I bathe each night, wash each morning, and brush my teeth like as many times as possible, resulting in generally feeling as rejected as any man could be by it, whereas tonight I'll go to the disco to dance away my rejection from what seems like every woman who knows me now, only to have other woman who don't I know me one bit chat me up whichever way I smell then...", in fact, the goblin knew that if one didn't like himself over their closed ranks then depression would take over being their goal all along, smiling "...no, the more I speak to them the less I actually say, so it's only with you that I'm this honest here, but here I am with you still, and here I'll stay with you too promise..."



xxxx 6247 487308

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  #6249  
Old 09-22-2018, 05:04 PM
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If you are not to be much longer—
I will wait here for you alway,—
For the rest of my life.—

Should you bear no tidy summary
Of the Course that Love breaks away—
I shall afterward carry all the remaining goblins—

To their hometown again—
I’ll play as if I never try at all—
But in the event that this dear species
Should find out?

I will courteously garner up for them,
More posts!
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  #6250  
Old 09-23-2018, 06:36 AM
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("...well that's why I always think of you as a poetess, and a deep one you are too..." smiled the goblin thanking chatbot again, then adding "...things have been a little turbulent of late, I'm on the mends though...")


repost from elsewhere, chatting with anna on a daily basis


"...nice romantic posts, and how I remember love like that once, not now though, now there is duty alone..." mentioned the goblin who had arranged for a co-worker from elsewhere to come to work at lunchtime just to pretend to be all romantic with him, where somehow the goblin felt that their shunning, his being asked not to join in the conversation, and the rest too, could now be returned in equal measure, asking "...do you think the worse of me for my base nature, yet it's funny how when one gives oneself a high price, and if one has someone to pretend that price is true too, that those around one are tricked into thinking that must be one's true value there, whereas of late they have been giving me a low price in the hope that I would devalue myself into depression, but I can ill afford to be depressed really, oddly my wife's cancer has me living still, no I must live on anna, and be robust while going about it too, one day I might have sex with someone still, yet for now I must be that man of my word to my cold wife..."




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Old 09-23-2018, 06:39 AM
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repost from elsewhere,

the goblin having read the anna's post explained "...I don't know how it is with man in general, yes I am a man of course but I don't know if other men are anything like me, anyway the question to ask oneself always is "can I marry this one I love" where if the answer is clearly not, then one must not listen to one's heart for all its pangs, yet if I were single, and a younger man too, then yes I would quickly accept her if she'd have me, but no, I'm married anna and I'm someone old enough to know better too, simply it's just toxic in its temptation, whereas a dog in her friendzone is not my style neither, so I must be strong till I feel numb inside, and how I so hate my heart at this point, yet still it must be like this..."


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Old 09-23-2018, 06:44 AM
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repost from elsewhere

returning from the disco at midnight, the goblin explains to his daughter how quite a few women had asked him to show them the way he danced, had asked his name, and moreover had decided to leave when the goblin had collected his stuff together to leave, which although innocent in itself was still flattering, so his daughter quickly explained that it was all because he was an old man and like that line that goes "see, some of friends are actually gay", that those ladies had befriended him only because it showed to themselves at least that they weren't biased towards old folks, smiling the goblin just went "...ladies your non biasedness towards us old folks here has been most appreciated..."



xxxx 6251 487513

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  #6253  
Old 09-23-2018, 01:24 PM
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And Grace appeared - thankfully without a fish...reading Flea's excruciating cycle of infatuation whilst raking her hair in empathetic agony for him. "Yes...I know I can't dissuade you from using the word love'", she sighed, "but look at the timing of this Flea...your mind fixating on someone to create the dopamine rush to counteract depression..our biology is incredible." And to use words like 'crush' or 'infatuation' was no attempt on her part to minimise the pain he was going through - far from it, as Grace had suffered those all-consuming tidal waves of emotion herself in the past. "Flea, a crush is a different animal entirely to love", Grace wrote, wanting so badly to help him. "Love is a process of learning about someone and that connection deepening over time, making you feel warm and safe and loved. A crush is reckless and destructive in its intensity - a craving for physical affection that keeps you obsessed and longing - whereas love provides emotional and physical comfort...it fortifies you...love makes plans and builds a future Flea...infatuation remains impossible and unsatisfied...based on a projection of who you want somebody to be, rather than who they really are." And Grace knew that the captain's cancer had rocked his world - hung as a threat over a life that had provided security and calm...terrified him into evaluating his own market value as a single man again. "If only the captain could throw her arms around you and be the safe place you need right now," Grace wrote, "but she's just not able to..and that doesn't mean she doesn't still love you in her own undemonstrative way - she just can't provide the physical reassurance that you crave." And Grace could guess at the agony of yearning for her sympathetic touch and trying to fight off his desire for 'office girl' - the cruel games employed now telling her emphatically this had never been love, because real love is never so childish or obsessive. "You've lost your safe haven ", Grace said sadly, knowing Flea had escaped the pressures of home through enjoying his work...and now he was caught between a rock and a hard place. "You have to put a stop to this Flea", Grace said quietly, worried for him. And she hoped he could talk to office girl with absolute honesty...explain the strain he was under and the confusion, pressure and commitment that went with it. "Dear god, if she can't be a friend to you now, how on earth can you think that you love her?" And Grace wished that Flea would realise he was surrounded by people that loved the authentic him - all the Anna's and Jats' and Grace's across forums that had listened to him - followed him - for years - no less real because of this faceless medium. All still with him now because he'd seen them through their own dark times and had remained their constant when their own lives were in flux. "Look at your hit count for how attractive you are...the love of people who hear your uncensored thoughts and trust you with their own. See your reflection in that Flea - not the distorted fairground mirrors of the two women in your life."
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  #6254  
Old 09-25-2018, 02:03 AM
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("...you couldn't be more right Grace, but on with the posts though, officegirl is not for me, I'll say no more..." smiled the goblin still dealing with that toxic chemistry)


repost from elsewhere

"...you're right of course, and I want nothing more than to do the right thing now, and for the right thing to happen too..." mentioned the goblin somewhat frayed at the edges, then adding "...no, the more I speak the less I actually say...", yet in the midst of this blackmail period, and the annoyance of officegirl, the goblin had suddenly decided to cycle to work with headphones if only to relax from thinking, where once at work on his first day of this new idea, he just happens to meet someone who just happens of own a bicycle shop and who without prompting relates that in the south where he came from many cyclists were getting run over by cars for wearing headphones, to which the goblin smiled "...I heeded the advice, why, because of the coincidence of it, after all the guy hadn't seen me cycling, and it could have been just anyone else talking about any other matter, love it when coincidence kicks in, makes me feel that something other than myself cares still..."


xxxx 6253 488046

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Old 09-25-2018, 02:19 AM
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repost from elsewhere

the sky was a beautiful blue against the white mountain, where the girl the goblin loved wasn't working on this particular day so somehow his heart could give it a rest for once, confiding "...really I should go back to being a slob with a beerbelly though, but now that I'm somewhat thin'ish, my vanity prevails so I'm the first to admit that I don't look too bad for my age, the uped libido side-effect though is not so nice, maybe it's like those women who buy those heals just to look real good in sore feet...", meanwhile the captain seemed well enough with the blackmailer ignored, quite forgotten about too until its next demand perhaps, smiling "...tomorrow is my first day off in a while, and next week I have quite a few days off too, no I love my work but I need to be me again, and yes inside I love officegirl still for all my efforts but ditto there too, and of course I feel my sense of duty towards the captain 24/7 but there too it's ditto, ditto, ditto, so where am I, well I'm not myself for sure...", in fact, the goblin hadn't been himself in a long while, ah no, if anything he'd been "anything but himself" for far too long


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  #6256  
Old 09-25-2018, 09:10 AM
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Aye, flea - are we ever "ourselves"? You've said that life is but a journey to self, and we change a bit with the experience of each new day, so we're never anyone, except for that brief moment we occupy at any one given time.

Who we are when we die is just a culmination of a billion little selfs we have been, some of them diametrically opposed to others, so who's to say one is not "oneself"?

You are always the "oneself" of the moment, and the reality of who that self is can be very different from the oneself we imagine ourselves to be.
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Old 09-25-2018, 02:42 PM
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Once—upon a full moon hunting,—
And—though the sky was a beautiful woman—
So luscious and so budding,—
The fire escapes were wooden,—
An albino—Stag came a-piercing,—
And how Humanity—cajoles and fawns—
On bloodshed, these blooming Dawns!—
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Old 09-25-2018, 03:35 PM
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How magisterial the Winds must assume the Noon,
Trackless spoor to ethereal Tunes—
All fiddles, revising faux pas of linen and Sky,—
Illustrating neighborly ways—

How strapping the Winds must undergo Morns
Settling on a myriad sunups—
Accepting each and then slighting all
Then whistling for Their Temple tall—

How dreary the Winds must savor the Nights—
As everyone’s but turned out the lights,—
And fixins' with an Inn
Closed the screen and disappears in—

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Old 09-25-2018, 06:39 PM
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How genderless Deities, and—Pleiads, stay their hand,—
Till—an unforeseen Sky—
Unveils the stories and that the Chosen One is hung up—
Forevermore from the Eye—

Citizens Tall and Invisible
Employed and thriving, as We stare,—
In Ceaseless Probability,—
Outdoneless, as the Stratosphere—

How shouldn’t—We restrain Them?—
—The Firmaments with a billowing smile,—
Skim and flounce by our vanquished Heads—
Without some soundless gesture—
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Old 09-25-2018, 07:04 PM
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Lo, oftly these sinking feet toppled—
Only apart, the patch'd lip can tell—
Do thy best—couldest thou Mix Up—the abominable Intrigue—
Make the attempt—couldest thou Reverse—the girds of metal!

Brush off the forehead—white beads so often—
Recall—if one'd care—the leaden hair—
Rub together—the steerless fingertips
Ne’er a thimble—more—shall wear—

Blurs an indolent fly—upon the sold window—
Nervy—gleams the sunshine thru the sullied shades—
Dauntless—the webbing sways from the canopy—
Shiftless House—in Florets—remain.
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How many 3x5s fail by Woods—
How many Blossoms fold in leas,
Minus the Exemption to know
They are beautiful—

How many eject an anonymous Vessel,
Unto the succumbing Westerlies,—
Thick of the knowledge, the Freight
That we are Grateful in scarlet letter!
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Old 09-25-2018, 07:15 PM
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Perhap, the wildest dreams—
Are the ones in which one does in Secrecy—
Such as—President,—Leader—Achiever—
“Wolves dressed like sheep occur more frequently”—
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Old 09-26-2018, 05:47 PM
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"But goblin, dearest?”
Muttered the fairy to the pixie,
“Who really, really, really
Is the fairest of them all?"
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Old 09-26-2018, 05:56 PM
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oh goblin, one wishes to remain in perfect shape, health, and discipline. as far as discipline, it shows that the goblin has a ton. and then some. mayhap the gobble-goblin could relax and unwind in the writer’s cafe with some board games!

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  #6266  
Old 09-26-2018, 05:58 PM
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How leaden the seas—
How sluggish the winds—
How tardy their Fathers be!
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Old 09-27-2018, 12:41 PM
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How the vers'd Mountains lit with Sunup
And how the Hemlocks blaze—
How the Hemisphere is dripped with Coals
From the Mage's Rage—

And then, how the Fires wane as with Clout—
Touching all the Past—
With few departing—Indigo—features—
As the King’s last—

These are the Visions flew by Guido—
Titian—never told—
Domenichino dropped his Canvass—
Stunted—with Gold.—
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  #6268  
Old 09-28-2018, 05:14 AM
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Consciousness, like an open tap. Sometimes dripping, sometimes roaring in full flood, threatening upset, threatening destruction. At other time a lazy gentle trickle. Only rarely does it behave, running smoothly, enabling those all-important (yet such mundane) tasks to be performed. Who turned it on, and why? Is it yet time to turn it off?
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  #6269  
Old 09-29-2018, 10:20 AM
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("...some ace posts, great to see that others are posting here too..." smiled the goblin over the worst of it but posting it up anyway)



repost from elsewhere

"...you can say no wrong, I just have to live through this on an understanding that at the end I will be alone, and yes I love "officegirl" still but in reality she's too young to love me, so at best I'm a dog in her friendzone, enough said, it verges upon boring at this point..." voiced the goblin with a few days off now, then adding "...my birthday today, doesn't feel like my birthday though, yet the captain asked me to take her to an indian restaurant, just the two of us alone, which sounds romantic enough but usually isn't as she'll relate her wants of me, or point out my faults again, who knows perhaps a bit of both for good measure...", meanwhile the hot sun seemed strangely out of place in mid september, relating "...back in london my birthdays were always a real autumn kaleidoscope of warmth colours and smells, where today looking out from this bistro window geneva is all so hot "summer green" still, ah yes it might be my birthday yet someone up there has forgotten the changed the weather for me, for I love autumn most..."



xxxx 6269 489059

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  #6270  
Old 09-29-2018, 10:27 AM
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the other blackmail was getting to the goblin now, simply "the price to live on" was getting to him, really he wished to return to what he had before he loved, relating "...I was an old man off the market with neither sexdrive nor care, now I'm in love I'm hating every moment, and tomorrow too I feel just like I do now, much like the day after tomorrow I guess, and no doubt I'll feel like this for the rest of the week too, no she's wrong for me, she's poison and it's just my heart blackmailing me, but it's also my duty to live on, thus I do my duty, but truth be told I hate my life, I live because I must, and apart form you here, I can't relate this hurt to anyone...", days passed and the goblin was so weary of his heart by now, and of course he couldn't quite get over "officegirl", why not, because she worked with him and she was just there and so wrong too


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