My Peers

[Gaines]

My last visitor of any meaning, other than some member of the prison staff or a novice attorney asssigned my case on a pro bono basis, had been an old friend of mine from back in our military days.

Bill and I talked about the old days and all the old friends, me shackled in a chair with the end of the chain looped through an anchor hook in the concrete floor like some rabid dog while he pretended not to notice. We had and hour and it flew by like it had been just a handful of seconds and the next thing I knew he was gone, on his way to the airport and his wife and kids back home. I went back to my cell on death row.

Five years have passed since his visit and now in my eleventh year with all appeals exhausted I was scheduled to get the injection in ten days. It had taken me a while to come to grips with the fact that it was really going to happen but eventually I resigned myself to my court appointed fate.

I didn't kill those two teenaged girls and I didn't know who did. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time and based on that and some lousy circumstantial evidence I was convicted of a double homicide in a state that believes the death penalty is a deterrent against crime. Since my arrival on death row I have witnessed four such sentences carried out. Their cells are usually refilled within forty eight hours.

My recent attorney is a young lady very professional and reassuring that we had a better than even chance for another stay of execution. It would be my third and that's a lot for a double homicide. I tried to stay upbeat as we talked not wanting to bring her down, but it was hard smiling like I believed what she was feeding me. When she left I laid on my bunk and listened to the ball game on my second hand clock radio. The Orioles won a close one.

I ordered pork chops, mashed potatoes and green peas with applesauce and a slice of German chocolate cake for dessert. Best damn meal I had since my arrival. Two hours before the end a clergyman came to my cell and we talked. He asked if I had any sins to confess. I must have laughed for ten minutes before I could catch my breath. A large crowd had gathered at the gates carrying signs and candles chanting down with the death penalty while the opposition chanted their side of the arguement.

Under my own power I made the final walk to the death chamber. I had drawn my own crowd of curiousity seekers all somber faced seated in their chairs peering through the glass at me like I was some kind of late night entertainment. Maybe I was.

My final words were simple. "I didn't kill those two girls and that's the truth." My attorney seated in the front wiped at her eyes and mouthed the words, "God bless."

They eased me down onto the table and strapped me in.

[luckyme]

Shoot Gaines, you had me believing it all the way from the first to the last sentence.

As real as it gets. Eerie, real disturbing and very well done.

[Gaines]

I added a little more to the end of it while you were posting your comment. Thanks for reading and commenting.

[luckyme]

I think if you leave out the how and why it's much stronger. Now he's a lesser man.

[Redlorry]

Those two last paras are, I assume, the bits you added. Lucky is right. Please take them out again, or put that information in earlier in the story when he meets with the new attorney.

Not only are they momentarily confusing when you put them there but they also look tacked on and instantly change the readers feelings toward the accused and therefore the satisfaction we take from reading the piece.

Having the info further up gives us more time to make our mind up about the accused so we remain engaged and satisfied at the end.

[luckyme]

So much better worded and exactly what I meant. Listen to Lorry Gaines, she's right.

[Gritsy]

Gaines...Of course Lorry's and Lucky are right BUT it's a great read and quickly we are sucked in too. I really liked it and I believe this is the first of your pieces I have read. Fine job.

Gritsy...It's got Grit!

[Redlorry]

Originally Posted by luckyme

So much better worded and exactly what I meant. Listen to Lorry Gaines, she's right.

Ha ha ha... Thanks Lucky. See Gaines, ol' buddy, ol' writing partner... I'm right!

Now repeat after me, 'Lorry is always right'.

He won't like it Lucky.

[luckyme]

I'd say, "Suck it up mister Gaines and take it like a man."

Lorry is always right.

[Gaines]

In the spirit of community I removed the addition. As for Redlorry being right let's keep things in perspective. After all she's just a girl.

[Redlorry]

Not even a thanks for my comments when everyone else got one. Now I know you're sulking!

[luckyme]

Nah, he's just a guy.

[connor1990]

agreed

[Gaines]

Pfffft...

[blackwire]

Great story and for a while I thought this was a non-fiction or recollection; that is until they killed him. Then, I was more wrapped in how well you wrote this. Hope to read more like this.