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The Art Of Winter

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  #1  
Old 12-05-2017, 04:18 PM
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Default The Art Of Winter


Atwixt flippant judgments— overly dazzling,
Glamorous first snow pours again and again
With partly charmed quivers in the splendid air;
One pewter cloak skews gelid, barbed doorways—
Advent crosswise with pompous, sparkling chinooks.

Overcome with macabre guilt, the meddling
Ochroid diadem flitters over a cryptic, ravished majesty
With its clement expression that conveys rays without elation.
Deathless puzzles carry gilded stars, circling around the diagonal fir trees.
They wonder if the comely flowers will peel off their blithe, ermine pageantry.—

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Old 12-06-2017, 11:52 AM
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"Mom! Chat's hogging all the adjectives again."

" Be nice son. You haven't been using them much lately anyway."
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Old 12-08-2017, 08:38 PM
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i swear, jp inkswell! you are da cutest! thanks.
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Old 12-09-2017, 01:12 PM
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I don't know why but on my second reading of a poem, I get it and like it. This is so fine! I only wonder at the end, are the snowflakes the flowers or are the snowflakes falling onto old flowers. Sorry for my misunderstanding. You write so well.
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Old 12-09-2017, 03:09 PM
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it's indeed a lovely poem. i really enjoy thee words.
although i might suggest after having gone through a second read, subtract a few punctuation, perhaps a couple commas here and there.

the one after 'pompous' 'cryptic' 'ermine'
and then you use a period and --- at the end which is much, not sure on the editorials of that style.

I really enjoy this piece. I'd suggest it's cooked



Atwixt flippant judgments— overly dazzling,
Glamorous first snow pours again and again
With partly charmed quivers in the splendid air;
One pewter cloak skews gelid, barbed doorways—
Advent crosswise with pompous, sparkling chinooks.

Overcome with macabre guilt, the meddling
Ochroid diadem flitters over a cryptic, ravished majesty
With its clement expression that conveys rays without elation.
Deathless puzzles carry gilded stars, circling around the diagonal fir trees.
They wonder if the comely flowers will peel off their blithe, ermine pageantry.—
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Old 12-11-2017, 01:06 AM
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thanks for reading, luciaphile. the flowers are the people's rosy cheeks and snow's all everywhere!

thanks for reading, bee sauce!
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Default The word BOT for Chat Bot

OK, Chat Bot, everytime I look at your name Chat Bot, I think of this dream. Here it is as I wrote it in my journal - just for fun:

March 27 2017 dream, seven days after total knee replacement when I was in the rehab hospital.

I entered a mansion from Civil War days being restored as a museum to its former glory. A celebration was being planned, so some of my friends and Grandmother, Mama, and Joe, too, were there. I wandered around and into an adjoining room which was all messy with lots of objects that could be cleaned up and used for the restoration. I bent to brush the dust off a big framed portrait of the General who had owned the house. But I also saw some plague bugs called BOTS shifting in the dirt around the picture. They were fluorescent green and slid up onto my skin, up my arms, and they dug into me painfully. I felt panicky. I ran into the main room again, crying for everyone to leave, run for their lives.

But Joe was calm. He knew the solution to the Bots, that is to spray them with an industrial strength cleaner. He sprayed my arms and I saw the bots falling off. But then I saw more, and they were crawling onto Joe’s arms! And the cleaner was running out! Someone had to hurry and get some more. I felt panicky, but Joe remained lazily calm.

So when I was better, I went back to the overflow room and found more history about the General, photos of him as a boy and a young man. He had a history and had grown to his high position in an interesting way.

Partly in my sleep and as I woke and thought about this dream, I realized the General was an ancestor of ours, and he symbolized me, and the house being restored was my body being restored. The Bots were my Botty Pain (body pain), helped by strong industrial strength pain pills, but Joe’s slow carelessness in the dream symbolized how the nurses seemed to be so slow to get my next pain med to me. I was panicky, or pain full.

Later in the morning I saw the Ginko tree leaf pattern on the bed curtains resembled the Bots. I associated the words Ginko and Bots, how similar they seemed to me.

This idea of my body being a mansion that was in the process of being restored helped my morale at the rehab, as I struggled with pain and moving and improving
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