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Search: Posts Made By: Mary333
Forum: Fiction 06-17-2013, 08:25 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 457
Posted By Mary333
I really liked this andI agree with Andy about...

I really liked this andI agree with Andy about writing it in the third person, works much better. I hope to read more of this at a later date.
Forum: Fiction 06-17-2013, 08:23 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 432
Posted By Mary333
Enjoyed the story Brett. I thought you did a...

Enjoyed the story Brett. I thought you did a great job with your descriptions and setting.
Forum: Fiction 06-17-2013, 08:21 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 764
Posted By Mary333
I found this a little too long and lost interest...

I found this a little too long and lost interest toward the middle. The writing is strong but didn't feel any connection to the characters or story.
Forum: Fiction 06-13-2013, 09:08 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 798
Posted By Mary333
I found this a tad boring if I am being honest....

I found this a tad boring if I am being honest. It is nicely written but I did find myself lose interest in the character very early on.
Forum: Fiction 06-13-2013, 09:05 AM
Replies: 12
Views: 738
Posted By Mary333
Enjoyed this very much and would love to read...

Enjoyed this very much and would love to read more.
Forum: Fiction 06-13-2013, 09:04 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 625
Posted By Mary333
I am a fan of your work on here Pat but was not...

I am a fan of your work on here Pat but was not hugely enthralled by this effort. While I found the writing to be good I just felt it would have worked better as a shorter piece of flash fiction.
Forum: Poetry 06-13-2013, 09:01 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 585
Posted By Mary333
Very nice piece Mothermay1. Just small error on...

Very nice piece Mothermay1. Just small error on the fourth line: wile should it be while??
Forum: Fiction 05-22-2013, 02:48 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 590
Posted By Mary333
I would agree with Nadja on this and also found...

I would agree with Nadja on this and also found it hilarious.
Forum: Fiction 05-22-2013, 02:47 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,226
Posted By Mary333
Nice work francienolan. I found your structure...

Nice work francienolan. I found your structure and writing strong but have to agree with the post above about the dialogue, which at times seems to meander on a little too long. Sometimes less is...
Forum: Fiction 05-22-2013, 02:42 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 1,108
Posted By Mary333
Thought this was great. The suspense builds...

Thought this was great. The suspense builds slowly and the ending is seriously well done.
Forum: Members' Choice 05-08-2013, 07:03 AM
Replies: 23
Views: 7,495
Posted By Mary333
I would also like to nominate Anna...

I would also like to nominate Anna (http://www.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=44228) by Pat75. It is a really well written story and the tension grips the reader from the get go. I have read the...
Forum: Fiction 04-22-2013, 01:10 AM
Replies: 23
Views: 1,404
Posted By Mary333
The fact that I have only 11 posts (12 now) has...

The fact that I have only 11 posts (12 now) has nothing to do with anything, I thought everyone on here was entitled to express their opinion which is what I have done. And I have read other posts by...
Forum: Fiction 04-20-2013, 11:33 AM
Replies: 23
Views: 1,404
Posted By Mary333
I think RabbitInTheSuit may need a little lie...

I think RabbitInTheSuit may need a little lie down. We are all here as writers and wordsmiths and I found this outburst uncalled for. The OP was obviously experimenting with the way he puts the words...
Forum: Poetry 04-20-2013, 11:23 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 444
Posted By Mary333
Grey

Pale grey twilight, hinging on darkness,
A forgotten instance bathed in melancholy,
Dreams, hopes and fears soon vanished,
Replaced as one continuing vastness.
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 02:42 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 901
Posted By Mary333
Did they not do something very similar with the...

Did they not do something very similar with the film Mama??
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 07:35 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 712
Posted By Mary333
Good story but please sort out the format, it...

Good story but please sort out the format, it makes it very hard to read. I'm beginning to get the feeling that Arwa may have something to do with Tallange, I may be wrong lol!!!
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 01:37 AM
Replies: 8
Views: 596
Posted By Mary333
I agree with the other posters that you could add...

I agree with the other posters that you could add more to the overall story but I thoroughly enjoyed both parts. You have a real finesse to your writing and I think this could be amazing with a...
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 01:34 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 796
Posted By Mary333
Very enjoyable read. Thanks.

Very enjoyable read. Thanks.
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 01:32 AM
Replies: 31
Views: 2,601
Posted By Mary333
Oh wow this was just so tense, really nice work...

Oh wow this was just so tense, really nice work Pat75. You have a great ability to draw the reader in and immerse them within the story and I loved the twist at the end. I spotted the other parts as...
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 01:27 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 733
Posted By Mary333
Have spent the morning browsing through the...

Have spent the morning browsing through the fiction posted on the forum and have to say I loved this. It is a sweet little piece of micro fiction that put a smile on my face. Thank you.
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 01:25 AM
Replies: 12
Views: 901
Posted By Mary333
Hi there, I liked your story but found the...

Hi there, I liked your story but found the overuse of dialogue, just my opinion, a little distracting but definitely think you have something very good here.
Forum: Introductions 04-18-2013, 01:22 AM
Replies: 2
Views: 400
Posted By Mary333
Hi everyone

Hi guys, my name is Mary and I am new here and quite new to writing in general. I am going to browse some of the other work on offer and hopefully be brave enough to post my own soon. Thanks.
Forum: Fiction 04-18-2013, 01:20 AM
Replies: 23
Views: 1,404
Posted By Mary333
Hi, I really liked this. It is really well...

Hi, I really liked this. It is really well written and I think should be taken for what its is. Don't agree with the other posts about the racism thing, didnt get that at all.
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