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Forum: Poetry 05-05-2015, 12:31 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,212
Posted By simply_words
I can relate to this numbness on so many levels. ...

I can relate to this numbness on so many levels.

Beautiful. Thanks for the read.
Forum: Poetry 04-22-2015, 09:12 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 451
Posted By simply_words
Thank you LeWriter. You're right. "So" is...

Thank you LeWriter.

You're right. "So" is much more fitting than "and". Almost as if that "rest" is a given thing rather than a coincidence. Thank you :-)
Forum: Poetry 04-22-2015, 06:32 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 451
Posted By simply_words
Sorry Soul

I'd like to apologise
to my weary soul

I saw that delicate bridge
between here and there

I felt the breeze
I tasted musky peace

yet still I walked on
Forum: Poetry 03-07-2015, 04:09 AM
Replies: 23
Views: 2,025
Posted By simply_words
"unfolding flowers of humanity" is beautiful. ...

"unfolding flowers of humanity" is beautiful. But I wonder if there should be a comma after "we". Or "we are". I only pick it up because it stands alone and, for me, it's the most powerful line.
...
Forum: Contest Central 03-05-2015, 03:30 AM
Replies: 8
Views: 6,233
Posted By simply_words
I don't understand the logic in this? You...

I don't understand the logic in this?

You created a story that didn't exist prior to your efforts. That's not a waste of time and effort?! Place it on the fiction board for critique or expand on...
Forum: Contest Central 02-26-2015, 12:35 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 8,843
Posted By simply_words
The wrong gift. "Come with me, I need to...

The wrong gift.

"Come with me, I need to show you something."
There was a coldness to his voice that I hadn't heard before. I shuddered as my breath fogged the early morning air. I checked my...
Forum: Poetry 02-18-2015, 06:51 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 631
Posted By simply_words
Inside

Step into my ear and walk with me awhile.
Travel slowly, hand in mine
through this boundless obsidian maze.
Catch that flare of thought...
that lambent smile transcends
my mind's lurid air.
Now...
Forum: Poetry 01-24-2015, 10:12 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 642
Posted By simply_words
I see where you're going. I think it's because...

I see where you're going. I think it's because the word 'simply' is one of those words that doesn't 'feel' like a two syllable word. It said so quickly. Simply. So I felt that the 'you are' added...
Forum: Poetry 01-24-2015, 06:37 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 642
Posted By simply_words
I enjoyed that a lot. Took me to the shore. ...

I enjoyed that a lot. Took me to the shore.

I would change the last line to "you are simply gone" - simply because it fits the rythm better and I don't like the lack of the sole 'you' in...
Forum: Poetry 01-24-2015, 05:43 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 740
Posted By simply_words
The beautiful and intriguing title drew me to...

The beautiful and intriguing title drew me to have a read and the imagery didn't disappoint. Top job.
Forum: Poetry 11-02-2014, 09:17 AM
Replies: 21
Views: 1,290
Posted By simply_words
It is very limited, I find. That's why I never...

It is very limited, I find. That's why I never use it. Like literally. Ever.

I like this poem. It's amazing. I also really really really love the use of semicolons in poetry. Especially in...
Forum: Fiction 10-31-2014, 09:55 AM
Replies: 1
Views: 731
Posted By simply_words
Amazon Live Chat (bit of fun)

I was...erm...bored and frustrated today (;-P) I received a package from Amazon that wasn't at all what I had ordered. I called them and I'm being sent another item, but alas it will be too late...
Forum: Poetry 10-25-2014, 06:57 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 533
Posted By simply_words
What a beautiful contrasting ending! I gotta...

What a beautiful contrasting ending!

I gotta give it to you KBR, that's hands down my favourite piece in a very long time.

I would ditch the 'of here', in the opening sentence of stanza two. ...
Forum: Poetry 10-23-2014, 10:06 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 776
Posted By simply_words
Thanks Lon. Where was meter an issue for you? ...

Thanks Lon. Where was meter an issue for you?

I realised the last line in stanza 3 was too short, so I've added to that now.
Forum: Poetry 10-23-2014, 06:37 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 776
Posted By simply_words
A Time To Rest

After summer's busy harvest,
and autumn's windy rush,
comes the quietness of winter
with its peacefulness and hush.

Nature seems to take a breath,
lays down to sleep and rest,
shuts her eyes...
Forum: Poetry 10-22-2014, 08:52 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 838
Posted By simply_words
If your poetry is an indication of your...

If your poetry is an indication of your sensuality...I bet that neat little phrase is your pillow talk?

Muhahahahahahahahaha
Forum: Poetry 10-21-2014, 04:35 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 838
Posted By simply_words
Sorry, No. 7, I'm below average IQ. I don't...

Sorry, No. 7, I'm below average IQ. I don't understand? You don't seem to be wearing socks in your 'far-off-wonderment...let me stand in the ocean...' style photo?

N.B. For the benefit of the...
Forum: Poetry 10-20-2014, 05:49 AM
Replies: 36
Views: 2,643
Posted By simply_words
Is that the pre-prequel in Suburbia? When...

Is that the pre-prequel in Suburbia?

When words fail you...stick to numbers? You said you've raised a child? Really? God help us.

5 again?
Forum: Poetry 10-20-2014, 05:24 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 838
Posted By simply_words
Acrostic: Anyone think I need capital letters at...

Acrostic: Anyone think I need capital letters at the beginning of each sentence? I tried it and it looked clunky.
Forum: Poetry 10-20-2014, 05:21 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 869
Posted By simply_words
It is cryptic. Especially, being the writer, if...

It is cryptic. Especially, being the writer, if you're unsure yourself. I'd like to read 1-6.
Forum: Poetry 10-20-2014, 05:16 AM
Replies: 36
Views: 2,643
Posted By simply_words
EZ, you're welcome to keep a copy. I must be...

EZ, you're welcome to keep a copy. I must be important in your mind? Or...you could just come back to this little thread and refer to it when you decide to break your silence. It's up to you...
Forum: Poetry 10-20-2014, 04:52 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 869
Posted By simply_words
I think titles are important...don't you? You...

I think titles are important...don't you? You didn't like the 'Longing' title, and if I recall...you agreed (shock horror) with iDick that EZ shouldn't use 'missing girl' in his title. So, you...
Forum: Poetry 10-19-2014, 11:28 AM
Replies: 36
Views: 2,643
Posted By simply_words
Weak and limited response...again, pretty much...

Weak and limited response...again, pretty much standard given recent posts. If you can't put the time into creativity I really wouldn't bother. Although...thanks for taking the extra time to read...
Forum: Poetry 10-19-2014, 10:58 AM
Replies: 36
Views: 2,643
Posted By simply_words
Well looky who it is... You were ignorning...

Well looky who it is...

You were ignorning me, remember? It's been a few days since you stated that...but I'm sure that's what you said. Hmmm.

Now for the matter in hand:

In two...
Forum: Poetry 10-19-2014, 09:37 AM
Replies: 36
Views: 2,643
Posted By simply_words
Hit a nerve did I sweetie? Yup. Thought so. ...

Hit a nerve did I sweetie?

Yup. Thought so. It's always a sign of weak person that can't argue a point without getting into a whack.



I did use italics when I said I know...that usually...
Showing results 1 to 25 of 305

 

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