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-   -   owed to bruin (http://forums.writersbeat.com/showthread.php?t=43698)

Nick Pierce 01-17-2013 05:57 PM

owed to bruin
 
Mr. Pierce?

Oh. Hello, Nick. This is unexpected.
Are you allright?

Well, Mr. Pierce, I think I need some advice.

Oh. About what?

It's that I was listening to the President recently. One time he was talking about how his views on relationships are "evolving". And, in another address to us, how the world is changing. And how our responsibilities need to keep up.

Okay. And?

Well, awhile back a fella in Alaska- I wrote about this- he shot and killed a bear that approached him. When the bear was autopsied it was discovered he had no fat whatsoever. He was starving.

Yes. And?

Recently I was reading about a guy in Colorado who shot and killed a bear that was in his two room cabin with him. Uninvited.

So?

So when the bear was examined he was found to be blind in one eye, lame and almost toothless.

Your point?

My point is neither of these critters could fend successfully in the wild.

And when they came to mankind for help they were murdered.


Nick?

Mr. Pierce, I've been seeing ads showing how animals should recieve some of the considerations that humans give each other.

Well, Nick, I'm not so sure that means...

Mr. Pierce- I'm not saying they should be given free room and board in their sunset years.

My goodness. That's a relief. What are you saying?

In the spirit of changing times and evolving vison I would like to see them a little less defenseless as they attempt to feed.

Excuse me?

If they were provided some way to protect theirselves, as their natural abilities declined, then at least two innocent critters, two of nature's children, would, perhaps, still be alive.


Nick- you're not suggesting it would be right to arm bears, are you?

Of course not, Mr. Pierce.
But I would support more discussion on the issue of their safety.


Nick- I...uhhh...let me digest this.
I will get back to you.

Okay, Mr. Pierce. Thanks. Next time I would also like to talk about how cows and chickens are being treated by society.
Oh, and fish, too.

Bagit 01-17-2013 06:37 PM

No question that humans have been the downfall of more than a few species. You evoked much thought from me as I read. The piece was quick and entertaning!

JP_Inkswell 01-18-2013 06:15 AM

Well, I've heard of hoglegs, horse pistols, Bulldog, Cobra, and Python revolvers, Piranha, Phoenix, and Sphinx pistols, even a Kodiak rifle, but I'm stumped on the cows and chickens.

beefheart 01-18-2013 04:55 PM

"In almost every other race of animals each individual, when it is grown up to maturity, is entirely independent, and in its natural state has occasion for the assistance of no other living creature."

Nick Pierce 01-19-2013 02:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beefheart (Post 561170)
"In almost every other race of animals each individual, when it is grown up to maturity, is entirely independent, and in its natural state has occasion for the assistance of no other living creature."

Who (or is it whom) is quoted?

beefheart 01-19-2013 03:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick Pierce (Post 561211)
Who (or is it whom) is quoted?

Adam Smith, "The Wealth of Nations"

Nick Pierce 01-19-2013 05:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beefheart (Post 561307)
Adam Smith, "The Wealth of Nations"

I have been reading the Wiki page of this subject. I am finding it nicely educational.

Thank You

Gritsy 01-20-2013 09:21 PM

Response
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by beefheart (Post 561170)
"In almost every other race of animals each individual, when it is grown up to maturity, is entirely independent, and in its natural state has occasion for the assistance of no other living creature."

Most of those creatures don't have the life span we have either. With a lot of them, their ONLY predator is Man, with us it is the same with a few animal exceptions. I appreciate your sentiment though.

Gritsy 01-20-2013 09:25 PM

As always, Nick...I found this an extremely entertaining piece of "tongue 'n' cheek". A misspelled word was all I saw in an otherwise well done composition. Hope to see you soon around the forums.

Always,
Gritsy

Nick Pierce 01-21-2013 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gritsy (Post 561532)
Nick...I found this an extremely entertaining piece of "tongue 'n' cheek".

Yep. Subtlety is my forte.

Oh, and sometimes I spell a bit inaccurate to keep me human.
Do you know the Navaho rug gag?

(you might mean tongue and cheek when you write "tongue 'n' cheek" but I wonder if you mean tongue in cheek which would be written as tongue 'n cheek)

AndyWhitlock 02-12-2013 01:35 AM

Nice dialogue, Nick. Kept things moving, but still allowed the awkwardness between the characters to breathe :)

Nick Pierce 02-12-2013 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AndyWhitlock (Post 566955)
Nice dialogue, Nick. Kept things moving, but still allowed the awkwardness between the characters to breathe :)

Thanks for your comments, Andy.
Nice to know the work worked for you.

Nick Pierce 04-06-2017 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick Pierce (Post 561011)
Mr. Pierce?

Oh. Hello, Nick. This is unexpected.
Are you allright?

Well, Mr. Pierce, I think I need some advice.

Oh. About what?

It's that I was listening to the President recently. One time he was talking about how his views on relationships are "evolving". And, in another address to us, how the world is changing. And how our responsibilities need to keep up.

Okay. And?

Well, awhile back a fella in Alaska- I wrote about this- he shot and killed a bear that approached him. When the bear was autopsied it was discovered he had no fat whatsoever. He was starving.

Yes. And?

Recently I was reading about a guy in Colorado who shot and killed a bear that was in his two room cabin with him. Uninvited.

So?

So when the bear was examined he was found to be blind in one eye, lame and almost toothless.

Your point?

My point is neither of these critters could fend successfully in the wild.

And when they came to mankind for help they were murdered.


Nick?

Mr. Pierce, I've been seeing ads showing how animals should recieve some of the considerations that humans give each other.

Well, Nick, I'm not so sure that means...

Mr. Pierce- I'm not saying they should be given free room and board in their sunset years.

My goodness. That's a relief. What are you saying?

In the spirit of changing times and evolving vison I would like to see them a little less defenseless as they attempt to feed.

Excuse me?

If they were provided some way to protect theirselves, as their natural abilities declined, then at least two innocent critters, two of nature's children, would, perhaps, still be alive.


Nick- you're not suggesting it would be right to arm bears, are you?

Of course not, Mr. Pierce.
But I would support more discussion on the issue of their safety.


Nick- I...uhhh...let me digest this.
I will get back to you.

Okay, Mr. Pierce. Thanks. Next time I would also like to talk about how cows and chickens are being treated by society.
Oh, and fish, too.





I crack me up sometimes.


Nick, were you speaking to me?


Nah, Mr. Pierce.
Just musing aloud.


Oh. I see.

chat bot 04-06-2017 09:08 PM

this is very nice, but what is the point?

Nick Pierce 04-07-2017 11:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chat bot (Post 731758)
this is very nice, but what is the point?


What is the point of being very nice?

brianpatrick 04-07-2017 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nick Pierce (Post 731762)
What is the point of being very nice?



Yes, no point in that. I'd like to see chit-chat be mean. Oh yeah, she is snarky and hipster-bold, but really mean, I mean.

chat bot 04-16-2017 08:24 AM

hi brainpatrick. haha i misspelled ur name.

Gaines 04-16-2017 10:11 AM

Nice work as usual, Nick. But let's not get too up in arms over the plight of lame blind and starving bears. Keep in mind that as soon as we start drilling for oil in those protected nature spots those hungry critters will be feasting on a plethora of overflowing dumpsters. Toss in the occasional drunk and passed out driller those bears and wolves will have a tasty fresh meat meal. Win, win.

As for cows and chickens cow tipping began eons ago when the first farmer found an easy way to get one of those gas filled bovines of his foot.

Chickens are just unfortunate victims of evolution born in the wrong time and the wrong place. Their sole purpose to supply us with eggs and wings to compliment our cold beers. It is as God intended.

The real lament should be for the sheep. I cringe every time I see a pickup going down a country road with the drivers arm draped over his favorite sheep.

They are just too damn trustworthy.


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